parenting
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The Coupon Book for New Moms and Baby Showers
The ultimate gift for Mother’s Day is Time for Mom. Hey Mom, you need this little book. This isn’t just a small “token” that checks the box for Mother’s Day or a baby shower. This is a treasure of more than 52 weeks of self-care – one of the most important aspects of motherhood. Don’t make the mistake of taking self-care too lightly, even though you can think of more than a hundred reasons why you think you should. There’s the laundry, the diapers, the doctor’s appointments, the meals, the clean-up, the snacks. These tiny humans (and maybe big ones, too) who feel like they cannot function without you. You’re…
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As Your Children Grow, Shortcuts Become More Important
One of the strangest phenomenon to plague mothers, I’ve discovered, is that as your children age, our free time shrinks. In many ways, this does not seem possible, and I have had the chance to discuss this with other moms, (for only a few seconds, as that is all we have to spare), who have experienced the same phenomenon. We are no longer tying shoes, dressing, bathing and spooning food into our children’s mouths, so, we should have all the free time in the world. In fact, only the opposite is true. Which has led me to adopt some non-traditional menu choices, which I would never even considered years earlier……
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Being Grateful Gives Us Something To Do
I think our greatest challenge as mothers is to teach our kids to be grateful for every little thing. This is the one lesson I think I I missed in the baby years, the toddler years, the school years… gratitude holds the key to a stress-free life, forcing our mind to see opportunities that didn’t exist before – and to help us get along with others. I also see it as a way to help us become leaders, with a vision to see how a problem can be solved, and to turn the hopeless minds of others so that they can take actions that are productive and lead us somewhere. Being grateful…
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Strong Boundaries in an Uncertain World
My middle-schooler is afraid to go to the bathroom at school because the kids are smoking e-cigs there. Some of the kids are getting caught and suspended. — but if you’re innocent, but just happen to be in the bathroom at the same time as the smokers — you have a lot of explaining to do. Safer to stay out of the bathroom. In the high school — I think the kids smoke there all the time, and everyone just looks the other way. The biggest fear for my high schooler is not the smokers, but the French teacher. If he can make it through the second period, he says,…
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The Best Part of the Fire Drill That Wasn’t A Fire Drill
Lightning struck the high school. I learned this while standing in Macy’s basement, where I was buying a boy’s jacket for Homecoming, in the spot where there is no good cell phone reception, and it seemed that at that very second, the cash registers crashed, and all of my texts messages went “undelivered.” But I had spoken to both boys — and they seemed fine, and very pleased about getting out of school. But the very best part was the voicemail from the school, which eventually came through to my phone, that explained that the kids were dismissed; and once it was safe, they were allowed back in to gather…
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The Uses of Enchantment
The day I decided to become a mother, I was sitting in a college lecture hall, surrounded by more than a thousand students, listening to a professor articulate a truth that I had carried around since childhood: Fairytales are important — and are crucial to our development as human beings. The unrealistic nature of these tales (which narrowminded rationalists object to) is an important device because it makes obvious that the fairy tales’ concern is not useful information about the external world, but the inner process taking place in an individual.†― Bruno Bettelheim, The Uses of Enchantment: The Meaning and Importance of Fairy Tales. I thought back, and…
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Time Blocking IPhone App
Now, I don’t know why I waited so long to install a parental control app that gives me the ability to block out times for apps. I rarely researched the available systems, just picking one of the first free one that showed up with positive reviews… So I hesitate to recommend one. But so far, so good. They are mad at me, yes. But the news of installing the app, and the realization of th control, went better than I dreaded. I’m not sure what I like about the app most: the fact that I don’t have to nag my kids to turn their devices off, or the fact that I can hear…
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You Have To Be Really Careful Around This Curve…
The college boy is rowing. New this year. When I picked him up to come home for Christmas, he asked me if I wanted to see where he rows. Sure. Of course, I do. He drove me past the house he already has rented for next year, with some guys, and yes, of course, it was too close to the bad section of town, and it looks awful. LIke worse than Animal House…but he smiled, and was proud. So I smiled with him and laughed. He continued to drive, for what was longer than I expected the drive to be to the river where he rows, and we ended up…
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Parent to Teen: Universal Language
In the morning, before I’ve finished my first cup of tea, I listen to the blaring sounds of the latest tunes on Pandora, a station of songs not meant for my generation to hear before 10 a.m. I don’t say a word about the decibels. Instead, I routinely ask if they would like Granola bars or hard pretzels in their lunch, if there is practice after school, and if they’ll need a ride. I have decided that if they can’t hear me, they’ll turn down the music. This must be their decision, you know. Because the second I start telling them to “turn that off,†the entire direction of the conversation…
