Parent to Teen: Universal Language

In the morning, before I’ve finished my first cup of tea, I listen to the blaring sounds of the latest tunes on Pandora, a station of songs not meant for my generation to hear before 10 a.m. I don’t say a word about the decibels. Instead, I routinely ask if they would like Granola bars or hard pretzels in their lunch, if there is practice after school, and if they’ll need a ride.

I have decided that if they can’t hear me, they’ll turn down the music. This must be their decision, you know.

My teen's photography class

My teen’s photography class

Because the second I start telling them to “turn that off,” the entire direction of the conversation will take a downward spiral – away from the food, the pick-up times. Eventually, even in the “silence” of their own music, space is created. A space they have created, and a space that makes them feel autonomous. The space I would have created would really be silent, the result of my command to “turn that off.” But that space wouldn’t be theirs – and that space doesn’t give them the security and the power they need to finally tell me what’s really on their mind. Those decibels are a small price to pay.

Music: The Universal Language

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One comment to “Parent to Teen: Universal Language”
  1. We don’t have music going around here in the morning..but oh do I love those 7 minutes when I take the oldest to school. You learn SO MUCH in those 7 minutes. I missed those 7 minutes when he was getting a ride to school each morning and am so grateful to have them back for a few weeks before he gets his own driver’s license. Who knew? 7 minutes…

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