Before the sun sets today, I’d like to live within the parameters of today’s minutes, hours and seconds. Lately, this has proved to be an insurmountable task. Maybe Brownies will help me get there. Today, at 11:30, I will pick up my newly minted Freshman at the high school to have his cast removed. Although, it just dawned on me that I have yet to take a photo of him with it on. There is no group shot with him and his brothers on the first day of school, my son on crutches having to trek through his first day of high school on crutches. What is wrong with me? The kids are already off at school, and there no way to corral them all back for a “let’s pretend it’s the first day” photo shot. Nor have I sorted through, and filed away, school papers from the last school year, which came home in May and June.
My mind is somewhere else. Far off into the past, and far off into the future. Today, I will try to bring myself back to the present moment — my son’s cast will be removed today. What a milestone this is. Although, we must not get too excited… he’ll be back in a boot, non-walking for up to three months. But physical therapy starts today… and that shrunken leg, which breaks my heart to see, will start its rebuilding process. This is a first step toward healing. For this, I am grateful.
If I can find that open window of time, when we are all at home from sports practices at the same time, I will bake Brownies to celebrate this moment in time, in real time.