Find some calm

These are pictures I took at a local park. Amazing wood sculptures. I kind of feel like this right now. School is starting this week, and it’s demands seem to make me feel like a drawf amongst the giants of paperwork and obligations. I’ve avoided talking about it, and thinking about it. It didn’t help that we went to the lake again this weekend. One final respite before the havoc starts. But the trip, although needed, put me behind.

Everything is going to be fine, my kids go to great schools, and they all have awesome teachers — but I’m still jittery.

It’s not the kids — it’s all the forms, and deciding what to sign them, and myself, up for. And, getting the house organized. I mean, really, you need to be prepared for all the new paperwork that’s coming. There are open houses and teacher meetings and sports sign-ups, so I’m calling my calendar this week, my “map.” I”d feel calmer, perhaps, if I knew that school meant the kids would all be in school — but they won’t be.

My son is heading to Middle School, and he’s excited, and a little bewildered. He’s not scared — thanks to an orientation, for sixth graders only, to walk around the school with their 8th grade mentors, and learn the “3Ls”. Lunch, lockers and lost. Can you imagine being that pampered as a 6th grader? I am grateful for that.

He’s not sure if he likes the idea yet of having a bunch of different teachers. But I told him, it’s awesome. Because now, when you go to Math, you’re going to have a teacher that LOVES math. And then, when you go to Literature, you’ll have a teacher that LOVES great stories. And, as for the schedule, just pretend you’re at Disney World, and you’re navigating yourself across the park to see specific shows at specific times.

I guess I feel so confident doling out advice to him about middle school, because I’ve been there.  But I’ve never been here, where I’m at now.  I feel tremendous pressure right now. To make sure the clothes are in tip top shape, the house is clutter-free and organized,

the kids get enough rest, and to cook big breakfasts that the kids will want to eat in the morning. I just feel jittery. I seem to know, in advance, what it will be like those first few weeks of school if we aren’t organized. All those years of nursing little ones in the middle of chaos must have taught me that.

In the middle of my daily yoga session, via DVD, the instructor guided me into a pose called, Parivrtta Parsvakonasana. It is awkward (but feels so good to stretch) to get in, and awkward to hold. And then he said, “Find some calm. There is calm in this Asana. Find it and settle there.”

So, yes, I am being stretched and pulled in different directions, but there is calm in this too. It’s just a matter of finding it and settling there.