Note to self: 13 Reasons Not To Host a Sleep-Over

DON’T DO THIS!!! WARNING! DANGER!!!

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This is definitely a list I need to keep and re-read, as the 4 boy’s birthdays revolve around the calendar. This happened June 7, for my second-born son’s birthday. But, I am just now recovered enough to be able to write about it. I don’t like going crazysleepover1.gif with birthdays, so this year, I compromised with a sleep-over. They want to watch the Cavs game, so I envision them all snuggled under their sleeping bags, lights off, their faces beaming from the glow of the TV. Instead, this happens:

I will preface this list with this: The boys were well-behaved and wonderful, except for the toothpaste incident. I would have them over again — just not at the same time, unless they’re driving, and in that case, I’d let them spend the night again to keep my eye on them.

  1. It all starts when I notice one of the boys is limping. He has a splinter — he’s had it for days, and he won’t let anyone, including his parents touch it. I draw a bath of Epsom Salts to soak it, believing I can get it to come out tonight.
  2. We fix hot dogs and baked beans. No one eats.
  3. Another one complains of a headache. The other friend, concerned, tells me hesleeover22.gif had it at the pool. I give him water.
  4. We cut the cake, sing Happy Birthday and open presents. No one eats the cake.
  5. The one with the headache is now so sick that he thinks he’s going to get sick. I call his Mom. She’s not home, but the babysitter handles things very well. I figure he’s sick from the heat, etc. Turns out I’m right.
  6. We settle them downstairs with sleeping bags, turn on the Cavs game. Instead, they pull out all the costumes my 3 and 5 year old wear.
  7. At this point, I discover the power of the Mob. One screams he’s hungry — and the next thing I know, my husband and I are cooking fresh hot dogs at 10 p.m. We turn down their requests for cake.
  8. We settle them back downstairs. Some have forgotten their toothbrushes. They insist they can skip it for the night. I have spares.
  9. They get settled back in the basement, we start to clean up the kitchen. I hear the words “Pillow Fight.”
  10. I realize now that one of us will have to “sleep” downstairs with them for a little while. Between the options of giving baths to our 3 and 5 year olds, I take settling down in the basement. (I’m too tired for those toddlers.)
  11. One of them goes to the bathroom, and calls me in. With tears in his eyes, he shows me he has hives all over his body. We have not pets. He’s not sure if this has ever happened before. We call his Mom, and she’s on her way.
  12. While we’re on the phone with said parents, we hear a scream from the basement. We run to check, only to find that the only boy who was asleep, now has his face covered in toothpaste. I guess they had to have at least one crank prank to brag about.
  13. They go to sleep. 7 A.M, they’re up, out the door, and holding a squirt gun fight.

Note to self: Do Not Host Sleepovers.

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42 comments on “Note to self: 13 Reasons Not To Host a Sleep-Over
  1. You brave, brave soul! I dread the day my kids are old enough for sleepovers, now I know the trauma I put my parents through. great list, happy TT!

    mines up.

  2. Well do I remember my own days of my own sleepovers. But with girls it’s a little different. Giggling, gossiping, pillow fights, pranks…Oh wait, I guess they all have many of the same elements.

  3. Great list, and I love the pics that go with it. I should have made a list like this when my eldest two were having sleepover birthday parties .. 🙂 Happy TT!

  4. I’m exhausted just reading that!! : ) Did you ever during the entire night get a total giggle fit with your husband over the shear madness of it all? You’re an awesome hostess!

  5. You are one brave soul Susie J!!!!! I thought I had it bad with my DD and 3 of her friends…yikes! I know I loved sleepovers as a kid and that’s probably the only thing that allows me to torture myself as it’s always a horrible experience for me and the DH, but I know she’s creating those memories that she’ll cherish forever.

  6. This is soooo funny! Last year for B’s seventh birthday I thought I would be fun and have seven girls over to spend the night…I should blog about that some day. It was absolute chaos. The kids we thought would leave, stayed, the ones we thought would be fine, missed parents. Some stayed up the entire night! Never again. She’s going to American Girl Place in NYC for her birthday this year.
    However, even though it was crazy, wasn’t it still so hilarious to laugh about?

  7. Oh my goodness Susie! You even had more boys over at your house! You had to learn the hard way! LOL
    I was all over the place while reading this. From giggling to “oh no’s” and the laughing out loud.

  8. Gosh, this makes me think of all those sleepovers I had when I was a kid. So much fun! Looks like they had a blast. I’m glad you survived!

  9. OHMYGOSH! That was the funniest TT that I’ve read so far today. Bless your heart. You and hubby must have the patience of Job. Look forward to seeing this list again next year.

  10. i said it before and i’ll say it again, SusieJ, you’re a living saint! my two girls when they’re running around and fighting in the house, i get tired reprimanding them picking up things, cleaning this, nursing bruises…but a sleepover with all boys! Whew! I could only imagine how tired you were after. Happy birthday to your little boy! thanks for the lesson learned here=)

  11. You’re giving me flashbacks! My daughter’s 11th birthday was in February, and I’m not over it yet. We ordered pizza for dinner, and one girl announced that she couldn’t eat tomato sauce…but then insisted on eating the pizza anyway. Another said she’d given up chocolate for Lent, then went into the other room to pout when I offered her a yellow cupcake with white frosting. We had a pinata…when it broke, one girl grabbed the remains of the pinata (with easily half of the candy still in it) and poured it directly into her own bag, which she walked around hugging to her chest to protect. Still, someone managed to get enough gum to leave it stuck in not one but THREE places on my living room furniture…one of them took a bit of the upholstery off with it. And in the morning when I (at long last) tried to round them up to gather their things, one treated me to a VERY long lecture on how everyone had kept their things packed and didn’t need to gather anything. Several items of hers, including a jacket and skirts, are STILL in my house.

    But when my (single, childless) friend who had come over to help suggested this might be my daughter’s last sleepover, I laughed…it was, after all, pretty much what I’d expected.

  12. My wife had a really good trick that’d settle down the sleepover girls pretty quickly. At around 10 (or, to put it another way, about 3 hours before SO girls usually went to sleep), she’d go down and threaten to sing lullabies. And if they didn’t — she did.

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  15. I know this is an old post, and I found it by luck. Funny read! But not funny when it’s happening to you! Thanks for the reminder never to have more than 1 or 2 kids over, and when I do, to expect the unexpected!

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